You know what happens when you let your laundry just sit in the washer? Your clothes smell like f-ing shit...

So, I'm lazy when it comes to chores. I leave dishes in the sink for weeks (especially silverware. I HATE washing silverware. And I HATE not having a dishwasher. GAH! Honestly, sometimes I only wash dishes when I know friends are coming over, or if I need like A spoon, I'll wash ONE spoon. That's how I roll...), I avoid picking up the dog's shit for weeks, sometimes months, I only mow the lawn when it's reached a potential health hazard level, and sometimes I forget about my laundry and leave it wet in the washer or dryer for days.

First off, my roommate is never around, so I have nobody to impress except myself, and that's not very hard to do - I'm easy. I don't let the house get like horders level (GROSS!), but I do slack on keeping things tidy. Anyway, my roommie (who lives with her bf about 90% of the year, but still pays rent and utils - score!) has a front loading washing machine for our house. It's cool and fancy complicated with all the buttons, but 1) I f-ing hate that I hit my knee on the stupid door all the time because I have to leave it open or else it starts to smell, EVEN after I actually remember to take the wet laundry out, and 2) it f-ing smells!! Even when I wash out the drum with "Dante's Peak" hot springs from hell level hot water and like a gallon's worth of bleach. I'm constantly washing and rewashing my towels because I can't stand stepping out of a nice hot shower, all clean and smelling yummy, and then drying off with a towel that smells like ass. The dog loves it, but the dog is a freak like that. And when that happens I feel the urge to immediately jump back in the shower to get rid of the smell that is now ALL OVER ME. For some reason this doesn't happen with my clothes, though. Just the towels... hmmm.

My friend Sydney and I had a sort-of conversation about this today:


Syd: Why would anyone buy hot pink towels?

me: Uh, because. Maybe they were on sale and gorgeous. Or their old towels were smelly. I hate smelly towels.

Syd: Don't you wash them?

me: Well of course I wash them, but it doesn't matter. My washing machine smells like ass. So then so do my towels.

Syd: Do you wash a lot of ass?

me: Obviously. Otherwise it wouldn't smell like ass. Maybe I should just buy new towels. Pink ones.

Syd: Or a new washer...

me: Yeah.


I'm still undecided on the towels vs. washing machine purchase. Although both would be awesome, there's not really enough room in the laundry room for TWO washing machines...

slr

Kindle WHAT???

My bestie, Amber, has steadily refused to purchase a Kindle until the cost dipped below the triple digits. Now that the new Kindle is $79 (seriously?!?! I paid at LEAST $30 more than that! Gah!) she ran out of excuses not to get one and begrudgingly agreed. But not before I threatened her life...

me: Did you see? Kindle down to $79. Damn it.

Amber: NO WAY!!! On amazon??????????? With wifi???????????

me: Yup. Go. Get. One. TOMORROW!

Amber: WOW. I am totes getting one!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
me: Seriously, now. I will slap/cut/never be friends with you ever again, I mean EVER, if you don't.
 
Amber: LOL. I will... unless you think it will go down to 50 bucks. ;)
 
me: Don't push me..... I keep those plastic knives at my desk.

I think she got the message.

   

PS - I've decided I'm going to start blogging a lot of our conversations. And this is just scratching the surface. You'll see. We're freakin hilarious.

PPS - Video blogging, a.k.a vlogging, is the new "it" thing.

Next installment: Why your towels stink like your nasty ass washing machine.

slr

Tell me, honestly, who doesn't like donuts???!?!

At lunch, while munching on my awesome, yet completely devoid of any form of fried dough, salad, with the debate over which taco truck was the best in town, and our distress over the severe lack of ice cream trucks anymore, we decided that society needs more mobile food entities. Sweet, fried food, to be exact.



In the incredibly wise words of Homer Simpson: Mmmm... doughnuts.



NYC has a Sweetery truck that they dress up and drive around New York. My question is why hasn't this concept been adopted EVERYWHERE???

SO... the brilliant idea we had was for an utterly delicious Doughnut Truck. OMG, GENIUS!!! Donuts are realively easy to make, and wouldn't be that hard to make in a cramped truck, and there would be little risk of food contamination because you'd just throw everything in the fryer! And since summer is over, as is the season for the few and far between ice cream trucks, what better than to replace our sweet tooth with a warm, freshly fried piece of sugar dough???



This is only a delivery truck, since actual Doughnut Trucks don't yet exist...



And we'd have music playing like the ice cream trucks do, but we'd play "Our donuts bring all the boys to the yard..." :)

I'm thinking this could very well be my retirement plan... because, seriously, who doesn't like donuts?

slr

Volleyball mania!!!

OMG it's HERE!!!! It's finally here!! I love V-ball season!!

So I'm officiating high school volleyball again this year. :) Last year was my first year and although I was reffing mostly terribly painful Junior High games with a few JV and Varsity games thrown in the mix, I LOVED it! I didn't so much love finding blue slacks for the uniform (I searched EVERYWHERE! It's like they don't exist...) and I was physically exhausted by mid-November, but the extra cash made it all worth it. Last year that extra cash helped pay the security and pet deposits for the new house I was moving into. This year? Well, it SHOULD go to the CC debt... and some of it probably will. But I'm thinking I want to use some of it to pay for a trip to Turkey in Feb/Mar. :) We'll see. That's not quite set yet...

So last weekend (not this past weekend, but the weekend before) my 6'6" friend, Elaina, had a couple friends in town and we ended up playing a 4 hour long pickup game of volleyball on the grass court on Whitman's Ankeny Field. Granted, I'm only 5'7", but I was damn impressed that I actually kept up with them! My timing was off on my attack approach, and I can't jump for shit, but I notice that I always play better when I'm with people that are better than me. My serves and passes were good, and on occasion I got lucky and made a kill or two. I was extremely pleased. I hadn't played GOOD volleyball in so long that it was like a drug. I was euphoric for days... however, my body disagreed with me. I may have been in v-ball bliss, but my knees said otherwise...

And then this past Saturday I spent all day at the CC officiating a HS volleyball tourney. It was really good practice for me, since my first match of the season last Thursday was a little tough. I'm definitely rusty on my calls and can't for the life of me follow rotations (it was so much easier as player - I just knew wehre I was supposed to go!), but having a couple other officials there to give me pointers and watch my calls was really helpful. By the end of the day on Saturday (I reffed the championship match, btw) I was all over it! Definitely worked out some of the kinks, and made a nice $150 in the process. :)

OK, so since I started this reffing thing last year, it still amazes me how HARD it is to go from being a player to a ref. I'd imagine it's not too difficult going from player to coach (Elaina is the assistant coach for Whitman, which is totally awesome), but as a ref I have to be completely objective. I can't make faces at a terrible set (although I still do), or whoot and holler at an awesome dig or spike. I can't get pissed at the official for blowing the game, cuz I AM the official!! It's a lot of responsibility to be the deciding factor in a heated match. It's stressful, let me tell you...

Aaaanyway, all this volleyball makes me want to sign up for a doubles tournament or something... although that season is almost over. We'll see if I still want to do it when May rolls around. :)

slr